500

Today marks 500 days since I chose to abstain from drinking alcohol in order to keep the monkey in its cage.

When I was drinking just the thought of about being sober for 500 days was impossible. Now having reached this milestone, it did come more quickly than I expected.

Crazy how the mind warps reality to serve its own needs.

So the question I am often asked... "Do you miss drinking?"

Sometimes.

Most often the itch would come when I am having a meal and miss the glass of wine with my pasta, sake with my sushi or the cold beer with my tacos.

I do reminisce about the times I used to sit on a patio or at the beach, cold drink in hand while I soak up the sun.

Now I just walk by these places.

I'm not going to lie... I look better, my head is clear and most importantly I feel better! Or for that matter I can FEEL emotions now instead of numbing them away.

It had been a rollercoaster ride processing all these new sensations on the emotional spectrum, good and bad, but I don't care as all of it has added so much depth and contrast to color my world.

I know this battle I am in will never end.
I know the monkey is just waiting for a moment of weakness.
I know now that I hold the key to its cage.

And that key is choice.

awareness, choice, different results...

Now I choose to make it to day 501.

#chasingbutterflies