cradled

I've been doing 3 hour sensory deprivation floats for a long time now, going deep to explore spaces within.

to heal

to integrate

to learn

what I have experienced in that tank earlier this year was terrifying, as I ventured off into the dark spaces where I hid trauma that I never wanted to find again.

but I did

and I processed them

I felt all of it

as the sessions continued

as I processed the pain I carried my entire life

I started to feel a shift

feel a shift...

yes!

there was less trauma, less pain and I began to drift into the other end of the spectrum. towards love, joy and happiness.

last night I went for another 3 hour sensory deprivation float.

this time almost all of it was in the positive side of the spectrum.

I felt wonder

happiness

and a feeling of love that I can't find words to describe.

then I fell asleep

but I could "feel" as I floated in that tank

that I was being held.

being cradled by God.

cradled by god...

the feeling of safety

security

love

acceptance

belonging

it was beyond anything I could have imagined!

I now realize it was everything I wished for

when I was in pain.

#chasingbutterflies