filtering out the noise

My resolution for 2018 was to abstain from drinking for an entire year, as I realized drinking was the gateway for the monkey of addiction to escape from.

I am successful in my attempt and this decision did change my life, as I was able to experience many new things, including a full emotional spectrum for the first time.

For 2019, I am choosing to continue with my abstinence from alcohol and I asked myself “what really matters in my life?”

I decided that this habit of constantly checking up on social media is not one of them.

Just like any addiction, I "never thought it would happen to me!"

I was not on social media for the longest time, then an account was made to help promote my company, then I made a personal account, then I...

never thought it would happen...

It was a slippery slope indeed.

How quickly a few check ins for status updates turned minutes into hours... then multiple hours.

Work was not getting done due to me being distracted by what was happening "out there" in cyberspace.

Checking in, scrolling, liking, reading, checking, liking, going off on tangents, searching, saving, liking, reading, research, liking, saving, more tabs... it only ends when my eyeballs are tired or my brain is saturated with information.

never thought it would happen...

Sometimes hours would just disappear as my mind was fixated in "learning something new", my OCD kicks in hard and I absorbed information like a sponge.

Then I'd snap out of it, look at the work I needed to do, started working on it again... then 'ping!'

An email? Status update? Notification?

Let's go see!

But you never just check for that one thing and stop.

You never just check the time on your phone and stop.

You check everything.

Sometimes hours would just disappear as my mind was fixated in "learning something new", my OCD kicks in hard and I absorbed information like a sponge.

Then I'd snap out of it, look at the work I needed to do, started working on it again... then 'ping!'

An email? Status update? Notification?

Let's go see!

never thought it would happen...

Quitting drinking has allowed me to see more clearly and something it definitely wrong with the amount of time I spend on social media.

With the amount of time I spend online.

I'm not going to look back and add up how much of my life I've burned chasing that virtual white rabbit.

But I am aware that I am stuck in a cycle that is dysfunctional.

And this has to stop.

So for 2019 I take on the challenge of “filtering out the noise”, by shutting down social media at 6pm weekdays and all day on weekends, as life is best experienced not through a screen.

I thought quitting drinking would be hard, but ironically I feel waves of anxiety already just typing this out.

Will you join me?

#chasingbutterflies